The arrival of the holiday season can be a notable challenge for many of us. Seasonal depression can be impacting many as the days become shorter and colder, and we find ourselves more isolated. The anxiety of social gatherings, or answering questions about our health, relationships, jobs, and families from Aunt Barb at the Thanksgiving table, and Mike from Accounting at the company party - can create tensions and lead to avoidance. For others the traditions of the holidays may highlight the loss we feel when a loved one has passed. Whether it is a first celebration without them or it has been many years, these gatherings can remain bittersweet, and we notice even more the empty chair or place at the table.
Even acknowledging we are not feeling so "merry and bright" can be difficult, as there seems to be pressure to have Pinterest perfection and Hallmark happiness from mid-November through the New Year. However, allowing ourselves to be authentic about our emotions can be very healing. All emotions are natural responses we have to our external experiences and internal thoughts and processing. Therapy can be a great space for more deeply exploring our emotions, but even these short tips can help. I call these the 3Ps -
Pleasant - Each day try to engage in one activity you find to be pleasant - even if it has nothing to do with the Season - watch a funny movie, go for a short walk, sip a cup of your favorite coffee, put together a puzzle, or snuggle with a pet. Variety helps, so try a few different ideas out.
Productive - Each day try to find one productive activity. Productive means making progress and not necessarily completing a task. Getting your mail, making the bed, cooking a meal, folding some laundry, sorting some emails - any and all of these are productive. Give yourself credit and notice how you feel when you make progress.
People - Each day try to connect with people. Call or text with a friend, talk to a neighbor, listen to a coworker's story, spend that extra moment with a family member. No matter how introverted or extroverted you may be, all humans are social beings wired for at least a little connection. Notice how you feel when you connect to the people in your life, especially those relationships you value most.
Just doing these small things each day, and noticing how you feel, can aid in resetting your mood and provide healthy emotional energy. Give it a try and comment to let me know what you learn about yourself in the process.
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